Mothers make a difference

Only one responsibility on earth requires 24/7 call of duty. No holiday, no weekend, no payment whatsoever. That is the duty of a mother.

When one asks "what does your mother do?" the best reply probably comes - "tell me what's there that mom doesn't do?"

After being separated from her husband, Anowara Chowdhury brought up her two wards - a son and a daughter - all alone. Though she had hard time running the family with her meagre earning, never did she compromise her children's education.

Overcoming many hurdles, Anowara managed getting her daughter Afrin Parvez enrolled to Khulna University of Engineering and Technology. Afrin obtained a higher degree in mechanical engineering. Her mother married her off two years later but Afrin's marriage somehow didn't work out.

As Afrin wanted to get her out of that wedlock, she found the whole world around her hostile. It was only Anowara, her mother, who stood by her. When everyone else advised her to compromise, Afrin's mother said 'yes' to her daughter's divorce decision.

It is a story of an ordinary woman who spoke about her extra ordinary mother on the eve of the Mother's Day. The day that falls on 13 May is a celebration honouring the mother of the family, as well as motherhood, maternal bonds, and the influence of mothers in society.

Now, after getting out of that marriage, Afrin completed her MBA from Dhaka University, working in a top-rank private bank. She is also giving counselling to other girls. Moreover, she is also working as a tattoo artiste.

"Tattoo artiste is still a 'debatable job' in the country. But when I told my mother that I wanted to learn the work, my mom just asked me to know how it works", Afrin told UNB.

"She never put an obstacle in taking decisions, and only because of her support, I have become what I am right now," she added.

If a mother treats both her son and daughter equally, it becomes easier for a daughter to grow up with a strong personality, said Ferdousi Sultana Begum, a social development and gender specialist.

"A mother should not only teach her daughter to be expert in household chores but also should build her capable enough to live in the society with her head up", she added.

Proper schooling and training from mother is very important in this regard, said Ferdousi stressing on the importance of mothers' role in growing their daughters up as independent human being.

Zilfika Jui, a student, told UNB that mothers can stand beside their daughters the best and to do so, they have to make themselves friendly, courageous and self-dependent first.

While talking to UNB, Khushi Kabir, a female activist, said, a mother plays the key role in her children's lives as she is the closest parent to them.

"As a mother takes care of everything of her children, if she guides her daughter as a strong person, to fight against all the odds in the society, the daughter will also become a person with confidence and strong mentality", she said.

According to Khushi Kabir, a successful and strong mother creates the best example for a daughter if she ensures to give quality time and proper guideline to her children.

There are many women who do not work outside, yet fail to build up deep relationship with their children while there are also many women who spend time with their children and motivate them even after working outside, she added.

"There is a thin line between controlling and guiding, a mother should know the difference and should not try to control their daughters rather than giving guidance", Khushi Kabir told UNB.